Everything bagels are my everything; hence the reason why I figured it’d be a slam dunk of an idea to put that everything topping on soft pretzels. It’s like one of those duh-this-will-taste-good-moments. I’m not sure I can properly express my excitement for this recipe because if you can’t sense it then I’m doing a v v bad job articulating how freaking excited I am!
Some people are sesame bagel people. Some people are asiago bagel people. But then…there are everything bagel people and that is where I fit in. My home belongs in between the poppy seeds and the onion flakes and the sesame. It’s a glorious place to be that makes your mouth smell terribly and there’s a good chance you’ll have dark seeds stuck in your teeth but whatever! Basically, everything bagels aren’t first date material. But they’re good life material.
I’m currently trying to convince two of my very single friends to sign up for Tinder. I’ve heard nightmare stories, I have, but I also know at least two or three friends who have ended up finding legit relationships on there. Dating is hard. I hated dating. I actually hated dating Joshua…haha. So much wishy-washy BS, so many, like, should I do this or should I text that. Too much guessing, man. You’re either in or you’re out! But I suppose that’s also what can make it exciting and fun.
I’m actually quite fond of my current role, which is being the go-to person for dating advice amongst my friends…mainly because I’m nosey and love being all up in their business. I’ve attempted to be the match-maker, and while I love it, I’m not sure I’m that great at it. Though, there is this couple I set-up in high school and now they’re married, have two kids and a super cute dog, so I have had success!
Speaking about success…Pretzel Doughnuts, man. Hello! I teamed with Almond Breeze for this recipe and yes, it’s absolutely dairy-free. If you like, you can substitute the oil for melted butter—it’ll taste delicious. I steeped the Almond Breeze with pretzels for a few hours, in the fridge, until they were nice and soft. I blended the milk mixture, resulting in almond milk that tasted EXACTLY like pretzels…with a hint of almond-y flavor.
There’s this game…not sure if you’ve heard of it…but it seriously is all consuming. Like, it swallows people for like 4 months out of the year. They join fantasy leagues. (We’ll get back to that in a second…) They scream at the television. Become depressed if their teams loses. Wear pieces of cheese on their heads. Stand in negative 30-degree temperatures…
It’s called football. You’re familiar with this, right?!
And fantasy leagues…really, boyz?! Really?! When I finally had the mental energy to pay attention to the explanation I got one of my dude friends, I was totally disappointed. I mean, statistics…off of how players play. UGH! Snoozefest, USA.
I do like boyz, though. And boyz like football so I guess by proxy I like football, too.
And I dig football food, obvi. Wings and celery and cheese sticks and nacho cheese and chips and snacks!! I can get down.