It’s kind of crazy to think that all those glorious things can exist in one bite…but they do. They totally do.
If you want to see how this is done, jump over to the Tasty Kitchen blog where you’ll find: step-by-step pictures (by me), and a the recipe. This is all so you too can create these bites of awesomeness.
This week mini-life lessons were just flying all around me. Wanna hear ’em?! Of course you.
1. If you go to the movies with a boy and he ends up eating ALL of your Sour Patch Kid–that you specifically wanted to buy yourself so you didn’t have to share–and you find yourself annoyed, he’s not the right dude for you. You should WANT to share your Sour Patch Kids, you know?!
2. I just watched Clueless for the bajillioninth time and just realized it came out in 1995…WHAT?! That’s SO long ago. How is it still so amazing?! How are the clothes still relevant?! How do I STILL know practically every line in that movie?!
3. I call my mom too much. The woman has been out of the country for a week and I’ve reached for my phone to text/call her, like, a million times. It makes me feel like an orphan. So now I just email incessantly. And I’ve tried to call my dad to talk…but he just presses ignore, I think.
4. Don’t get addicted to those San Pellegrino Aranciata orange soda things. I’ve bought two six-packs in the past two days and now I’m kinda poor. Don’t go poor because soda. That’s just silly. Everyone knows if you’re gonna go poor because of anything it should be because of shoes.
5. Sweet potatoes aren’t yams. But yams are sweet potatoes. WHAT?! Good gracious, USDA, do you understand how confusing you’re making me/the entire country?
Abby emailed me a few weeks ago requesting a recipe that could be made in the microwave. You see…Abby is shacking it up in a dorm this year with only two kitchey-type tools at her disposal: a microwave and a mini-fridge. And since she wants to spend her money on more important things like booze, shoes textbooks, she wanted it to be budget friendly.
No biggie, Abby; I got you, gurrrrl!
Meet the Twice Baked Potatoes. They meet the criteria, for sure. They’re perfect for fallish, chilly weather; they take barely any effort/money; and they can be made in either a microwave OR oven. #thricebingo
I made ’em two ways: decadent and amazing (bacon, cheddar, jalapenos, sour cream) and healthy and good (yogurt, chives, zucchini).
I’m not even gonna pretend the healthy way tastes better. It just doesn’t. BUT it is healthier …so there’s that.
Hi! I have biscuits this morning…with bacon…and some sort of glaze situation! Can we talk?
Since I’ve lured you with the smell of sizzling salty bacon, I’d like to share three incredibly significant boring things that happened to me yesterday:
1. Two five-year-old girls (separately) complimented my new leopard ankle boots. I think this might mean I’m a trendsetter. OR it just means that these little girls want shoes that look like their fav stuffed animal. Either way, I’ll take it.
2. I had TWO dinners. Yes, last night I sat down to a 7-course tasting menu to only then find out that was the appetizer. Hello!!! Amazing!! I’ll tell you all about it on Monday, but in case you’re even nosier than me, keep up with my Sonoma food and wine thrills on FB & Twitter.
P.S. If you’re lucky, I might post a pic of me voming on the scheduled helicopter ride. (Can we say….schmexy!!!)
3. I packed a few biscuits in my bag to the airport. And since I’m a loser and always try and get away with bringing stuff I shouldn’t (read: hair spray), I always have to show the security dude the guts of my suitcase. It always feels violating. Always.
Is he judging my folding techniques? Are my bras and underwearz gonna fall out onto the floor for the world to see? Terrible! Embarrassing! Also, kinda gross. Seriously. That floor’s disgusting.
Sometimes I do things I’m not so proud of. This is true.
Like…putting ice cubes in white wine. I’m impatient. I dunno…in the privacy in my own house I like “mom” wine. Gross.
I sometimes buy three bags of groceries and then decide I don’t want to cook and go out to eat instead. Total brat.
I’m also known to back out of Saturday night plans…because sometimes sitting on the couch internet stalking–for some reason–sounds like WAY more fun. Lame. Totally lame.
I’m really bad at returning library books. I found two under my bed. I’m guessing I now owe LA County Library like thousands of dollars for two $10 books from the 70s. I’m also pretty convinced that those fees are going to end up at the DMV. LA doesn’t play.
Sometimes though…sometimes I do really good things.
Like look at my friends dead in their eyes and tell them that I love them. This makes them super awkward and squirm in their seat. And then they usually just tell me to shut up.
I really dig telling strangers “bless you” when they sneeze. They’re always pleasantly surprised.
Whenever a boy, who I don’t know, opens the door for me, I look at them in their face and smile extra hard. And not in a I-like-you-let-me-make-you-eggs-and-bacon kind of way, but in a thank-you-for-being-a-damn-gentlemen way…now let’s get married!! JK.
No, no. I just like saying thank you the proper way, that’s all.
If I’m feeling particularly rich, I’ll put $2 (instead of $1) in my barista’s tip jar. They totally deserve more. Maybe more money and a hug? I’m a handful without coffee.
I can also turn a sandwich into a pizza. I think this qualifies as one of the good things I did recently.
Summer’s totally in full effect. I haven’t watched TV in days, my nails are bright pink, I can’t leave the house without sunglasses, and all I want to do is sit outside while drinking pink wine and eating pizza.
And iced coffee. I’m eating that like crazy, too.
I’ve been playing with a lot of pizza topping combinations and I’m really digging the whole sweet fruit thing with cheese and some sort of salty meat. It’s a winner of a combo; made only better with a drizzle of this balsamic/honey reduction thing I made. Sounds fancy (meh)…nah! Totally easy.
I was going to use blackberries instead of the figs, but when I saw them perched, looking all cute in their pretty little basket, blackberries didn’t have a chance. Continue Reading
Hi Shrimp & Grits, you look kinda cute today–with your gigantic shrimp, runny egg, creamy, goat-cheesy grits…ugh. You’re so cute I kinda wanna punch you.
I’d never had Shrimp & Grits with an egg involved until a few nights ago. Good heavens. Just when you thought the dish couldn’t get more awesome, a restaurant (in NY) throws a runny fried egg in the mix and turns my world upside down.
I wanna say it was the most memorable thing about my trip to NY. There was also the amazing view from The Boom Boom Room at the top of the Standard Hotel; the incredible arepas from Caracas (had one for lunch and then one for dinner); the PB&J and pickle tea sandwiches from Fatty Crab; and the salted caramel cupcake from Butter Lane. P.S. There’s a chance I might’ve gained a pound or two. Whatevs.
But for reals, the best thing from NY was seeing some of my best friends from college–some of whom I hadn’t seen in years. They looked a little older, sounded more mature, but after five minutes we were back to how we used to be. Don’t you love it when that happens?
Making these scones forced me to make five pieces of bacon. And just when I was about to take a picture of said five pieces of bacon, I tripped over my own weirdly small feet and dropped them.
It felt like that cliché moment when a little girl drops her ice cream cone.
It was just plain sad.
And since I’ll use any excuse I can get, I think this is a valid reason for me to get a dog soon because then it wouldn’t have gone to waste. That’d make grandma proud. She doesn’t like food to go to waste. Grandmas put half drunk glasses of milk in the fridge for later.
You guys have seen the movie Spanglish, right? Came out a few years ago, about a maid who sort of falls in love with her married boss, who coincidentally happens to be the “best” chef in America. The movie isn’t terrible; Tea Leoni is kinda funny in it. And the relationship between Adam Sandler and Paz Vega is interesting, but the most unforgettable part of the movie is this sandwich.
One evening after a late night at the restaurant, Adam Sandler’s character comes home and makes a sandwich. Not just any sandwich. But the best sandwich ever created.
The sandwich is actually pretty simple and relies heavily on good quality ingredients. It’s on a white, rustic bread. One slice has melted cheese (monterey jack, to be specific), the other slice has a swipe of mayonnaise, butter lettuce, fresh tomato slices and bacon. Oh and a fried egg over easy, which makes it a tad bit messy, but really just results in it being totally awesome.
Cutting my own bangs. It’s true. I tried it a few days ago because I was too lazy to drive 5 minutes to my hairdresser for a trim….aaaand now I’m grateful bobbi pins were invented. Not good at cutting bangs/fringe. Check.
I’m not good at moving furniture, lifting heavy boxes, using a drill, etc. Last week I tried to hang curtains and broke out in a sweat which lead to lots of cursing. I’m convinced that this is why boys were invented.
Lastly (because I’m just about perfect at everything else), grilling stuff. There are so many variables with a charcoal grill. Where is the hottest part of the grill? When are the coals hot enough? Why is there so much stupid smoke? Dangit, there isn’t a thermometer on the cover…blah blah blah. So basically what I’m saying is that this Grilled Breakfast Pizza stressed me out. But I did it. And it was totally worth it. And since I lived to tell about it, I can tell you exactly what you’re not supposed to do and everything you should do so you end up with an amazing pizza. Ready? Annnnd let’s begin….